So today The Father of my Children* comes to me and says, "for Father's Day I want a day to myself so I can get some chores done." To which my immediate response was something like, "Oh nice, so you're saying for Father's Day you don't want to be with your family!"
We came to an agreement that Saturday (this day) I would take the kids out and go to the doctor and then to Fargo for some new shoes. On the way to Dr. M.'s we past the Shell station where Lulu wants a ball from the vending machine, so I told her we'd stop at Walmart for a vending machine ball. So off we go for Lulu's adjustment, then leaving and passing Walmart I hear screams from the back seat "BALL, BALL!" So I change lanes and head into the Walmart parking lot. First of all when do kids get smart enough to notice where we are when Walmart isn't even seen from the highway! Second, darn her for having the memory of an elephant! So in order to not be one of those Mother's who makes promises and doesn't keep them I say, "Ok, stop screaming we're going to Walmart." So we pull in and I park by a cart return (which all Mom's should do when toting 2+ kids) and get the kids inside and proceed to pick up a few things I don't NEED as all Walmart shoppers do! After checking out I pass the balls forgetting of course that I said we'd get one, to which an exclamation for my failing memory was revived by Lulu's sheer determination to have a new ball for here excessive collection. So I go to the cashier for change, he says he can't open his drawer, so I go to customer service where she says she needs a CS to open the drawer. This things are irrelevant to me the customer, why don't they just tell me to buy gum or something!!! So I finally figure this out, and buy something to break a bill for the .50 cent ball machine. I take my $1 bill to the coin exchanger and... the damn thing spits out 2 quarters, a dime and a nickle!!! So off to customer services again... yes, to wait for a CS to open a drawer so I can get some F'in change for the ball machine! Stupid Mom, I give Lulu .50 cents (the 2 quarters) to hang on to... then after the exchange of proper money is done I head to the ball machine and ask Lulu for her money. As you've guessed she's dropped it and not mentioned it to me! So back to find the money, and then back to the ball machine to finally get her BALLS! I am pushing the cart to the cart return with kids who are getting cranky from hunger and heat.
Meanwhile, I have been texting my friend back and forth to let her know I am on my way to pick her up to go to Fargo.
So I am loading the kids and fixing them up with water and a snack... when during my 2nd to last trip from the cart return I snag my shorts on the cart return bumper and rip a huge hole in my shorts so that 1/4 of my a*s sticks out... and well that's just not a cute part of my body these days! I say to myself some profanity and think to myself I will just get myself some new shorts in Fargo, so no big deal.
I look out the aisle and decide to go out the wrong way (Walmart is one way parking)... just a moment later CRASH! GRRRRR!!!! I can not believe it! For a .50 ball I have spent money I didn't need to, ripped my only pair of shorts and now wrecked my car all in efforts to stay away from home so Daddy* can do chores!
Well, the trip to Fargo was a success, if you don't include the much crying we endured from Lulu... she's just not a good car trip kiddo! She was able to jump on Hailey's Jump-High and eat Cold Stone Ice Cream.
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